today is the day people, strap up your BluTooth like a good Trekky

I got one, I use plantronics, since they were on the moon and such back in the day…

anyways…onto the drivel…

TOP TEN WAYS TO REALLY KNOW IF YOUR CHILD’S SCHOOL IS SCIENTOLOGIST

10. Placenta and Barley Formula is on the school menu.

9. “Battlefield Earth” is required reading

8. The auditing course has nothing to do with taxes

7. “Intro to Psychology” replaced with “Intro to Dianetics”

6. “Fair Game” is the standard in all organized sports

5. Grades are given in gradients from OT I to OT VIII

4. Required school supplies include glue, a ruler, and an E-meter

3. The “ARC triangle” and the “KRC triangle” have nothing to do with geometry

2. Approved field trips include a visit to The Freewinds and New Life Improvement Center in Plant City, Florida

and the number one way to know your child’s school is really Scientologist:

1. Tom Cruise is the principal

thanks to abby @ Yeeeah!

Us Weekly says, “$28-million-a-year Rodriguez, 32, has made numerous solo nighttime visits to Madonna, 49, [sneaking] out “as late as midnight.”

Again … who really knows or cares … as long as they are happy right?

when did the 90s come back?!?!

People says, “Last week, just days after New Edition took home the Golden Note Award at the 21st annual ASCAP Rhythm & Soul awards in Beverly Hills, the group (minus Bobby Brown) went into an L.A. studio to record with the New Kids. The ensemble track, titled “Full Service,” will appear on NKOTB’s not-yet-titled upcoming album.”

We gotta ask Larry Sutton about this on Thursday for shizzle

Lilly Allen and “The Lohan” are rumored to be doing a track together, this all ties into Mark Ronson (Sam Ronsons Bro) is a music producer..anyways….i like Lilly..her dad is cool … and you know i LOVE me some lohan

This is a fun little project … check it out HERE

sick .. i’ll letcha know how it goes!

12 reasons why “MOViES” are a crappy first date ideas….here are the last couple, if you want more check them out HERE

12. You can’t pay attention to the movie
11. Movie theatres are too almost-romantic
10. It’s BLEEEEEEPING expensive

hella funny…number 3 is really funny…check it out!

here is another list that is cool…a little background of my life…im a big dude…my sister is not, she eats very healthy and does yoga…she even “composts”…whatever that crap is…anyways…here is something she sent me via the email at MARCUS@MOVIN997.COM

“The 11 Best Foods YOU Aren’t Eating” - Ny Times Blog

short story long … i gotta start eating half of these….im gonna go with Frozen Blueberrys

Katie and her Mini-Me

MTV wants Ol Trainwreck Britney Spears back for the VMA’s … hope she puts on more clothes

Closer Magazine claims that Angelina Jolie popped out the kids last night … who knows if its true…I hope they made the trip safe…

K-Fed has a new song called, “Daddys Home” …. what the hell kinda title is that???

so the cops came down to the station … i guess they got a complaint and are here to serve and protect…you ears from Baltazar’s laugh

The weekend, was, well off dem chains! We partied really hard and my right wrist is permanently dark from the ink stamps that the bouncers use.

kick in a bOx was in full effect this weekend, we had a huge end of the season party with open bar … yes … open bar people … we threw it down hard at The Cellar on Saturday night … here are some pics from that fine event.

First, we rocked out at The Dubliner on Friday for some pool and whiskey…

Stryker the Homey … tanked … just like his mamma on Prom Night

In honor of pride weekend, my kitties, Ty & Farooq got it on’n poppin!!!!!

Caught in the act!

Adam Sandler did it in Happy Gilmore…I continue it with a pool stick.

The Only Way To Travel - Drunk Train!

This is how we started Saturday night…

kick in a bOx group shot

the ladies of bOx … so fine … so fine

off to the taco truck ……… holla

Bottom line … anything with dead people…makes you weird…but snaps’n props to them because i’m not doing that crap.

Last night my entourage and I were rocking out at San Fran Magazines “Best of the Bay 2008″ … here are some pics from last night.

Yeah, thats Me and my man Sal Castenda … he’s the man.

If you heard us talk this morning, here is a picture of what Baltazar’s hair

Paul F. Tompkins was in studio yesterday, here are some pics from him talking about how Oprah and Weed are the end of the world…or something….I wasn’t paying attention because I was trolling around for the Mini-Me sextape…

…hrmmm…babies do funny things to girls…. i read about what happens in a book once..if you dont know, then just enjoy this

J-Lo in Madrid, looking sexy as ever.

Pregnant….i guess….Mary Hart might be wrong …. but she’s hot so who really knows

hahaha…Cheryl Burke… so silly

Wanna be like Alicia Keyes…drink Vitamin Water….

this is the girl in the mini-me sex tape…awwwwh..isnt she cute

let the Oscar buzz begin……this movie looks great

I hate doing Amy Winehouse stories … because she’s a crackhead and i dont dig her music

but Rolling Stone says, “she’ll be dead within a year, a somber new Rolling Stone Magazine profile and interview with the British singer predicts-even if not directly.”

President Bush … being … well … enjoy this video.

DUI … and well who really cares about this dude..but at least his mug shot isnt so bad, anyone else think he’ looks like Alonzo Boden (last comic standing)

Who is repping the crypts in LA now?

Ryan Reynolds

hahahahaha

MAYBE, POSSIBLY, KINDA hot new couple alert

One of the full house chicks on Letterman talking smack

WTF?!?!

20 MILLION BUCKS !@#!@#!@

peace…chunk out this piece!

So my girl Anna sent me an email at MARCUS@MOVIN997.com and sent me an email of this dude leaving a “swingers” voice mail … if it ends up on youtube I’ll post it ….

since we couldn’t run the voice mail … here is something else she sent me

**********************
I’ve got a goldfish which lives in a bowl on my desk. It sits about two feet away from me. I feed it flakes everyday.

Just now, the damned thing took a DUMP, turned around, and ate it. I know I read somewhere that goldfish have a memory span of 3 seconds, but for real, you can’t remember taking a crap a millesecond before turning around and registering it as food?

Oh, god. He just did it again. He belongs in a toilet.

**********************

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

if you want more of Anna … check her out on yelp @ annak.yelp.com

update: Anna is in green and likes walks on the beach and kick ball …

J-Lo’s post baby bikini body

The Wentz’s are … well …. hacks … but here is the cutest puppy they just adopted …

SO CUTE ! ! !! ! ! ! !!

Wanna lick David Cook?!?

now you can … well you can lick his stamp….

Hillary Swank really wants us to think she’s a dude

she wants $450,000/year for the kids?!?!?!!
wtf … thats just crazy

the only reason why retail is the best job in the world….

in case you havent heard or seen this yet

OK … if this is “fat” … then I just quit this bitch…for reals …

Country Star = Business Handler

“While Tim was performing at the White River Amphitheater in Auburn, Washington last night, he watched a man rush to the front of the stage. This overly aggressive fan attacked a female fan and Tim witnessed this incident. Tim called for security, but when they could not respond quick enough Tim and several crew members removed the fan from the audience where he was then turned over to the local authorities.”

nick cannon=whippppppppppped

NPH!!!!!

the blog wouldnt be complete without a topless Matty

July 17th … Idol = San Francisco

attn freaks….bring it!

If you want to check this out yourself here

http://wigflip.com/automotivator/

Rehab ….

hahahahahaha

whats wrong with this picture?

if you guessed the left over baby who is neglected… your correct!

check out the next issue of Rolling Stone mag, its got this cover plus a great article about my man Barack!!!!!

if your 4 and 2 year old are in therapy .. you failed as a parent ….

ya.. failed.

hahaha…..hahahahahahahaha

just cause its funny

‘ol billy and his new lady

JT slanging the stank now

Paris needs to pay her bills

nah…her battery just died…funny….not funny funny haaa haa … but ya know..funny.

…Britney Spears is working on a new album according to a starbucks bathroom clearner LA music producer…which is awesome…cause you know chunk loves some brit-brit

…Ben & Jen heading to divorce?!? .. Affleck and the Alias are heading to divorce court?

and on the creepy side

Brooke said, “I know I’m a grown woman, but it’s like he’s touching an old car. He used to change my diaper!”

ummm… here is the pic in question…you make the call

Al Gore reps the streets

whatever… some times people are just silly

OK, I was talking about this yesterday off-air, some people will do anything for ratings … well TV has hit a new low

“I was raped and he was molested”

what?!?!

watch the video for more info … but damn … really … i’ve heard of a lot weird things for ratings … but damn … that is a lil overboard!

hahaha

sometimes you can’t make up stories this good… so the dude below was Anne Hathaway’s BF, they got caught coonoodling on a boat and the pics are RACY … then a scandal broke that he’s a shady business dude…then he gets dumped a few weeks ago before the Get Smart movie premiere … and now he gets arrested in New York…hahhaha

“He is accused of falsely telling an investor that he had been appointed as the chief financial officer of the Vatican.”

Leaked pics of Nicole Richie and The Olsen girls getting down and grimey at a LA house party … good times….

AskMen.Com losing some street cred…why is Katherine Heigl the “Worlds Most Desirable Woman” … hrmm???

Larry King’s wife = Rehab for pain pills

Makes sense….i would be popping vics if I had that all up in that mess…..

Again … anything for ratings

Rihanna = weird

“It’s Roman numerals. Me and my best friend got the same thing. This is her date of birth and she has mine. I love her so much. More than some of my family. She’s a blood sister.”

Not dating Chris Brown, getting hella Tats, pixie haircut … hrmm…. i dunnnnnnnno… i think lohan and sammy are “blood sisters”

Nate Dogg arrested .. again … kinda like DMX of the west coast…speaking of that DMX was also arrested yesterday… cant these idiots get a driver??!!?

Moments before she are the mic

Released from the hospital .. and smoking … what’a crackhead

I would post the video of the new song by Heidi Montag … instead … here is a picture of a wall … much more entertaining

hahahaha

alrighty … im out this piece … holla

twitter.com/movin997

tell ya mamma

Sucks … the last of the legends are gone … we will talk with Joan Rivers about what she thought and her words … they must have partied together. He was heading up here in July to the Mountain Winery … that dude was touring into his 70’s.

He was the original guy to “keep it real” before it was real and the old folks called it the “truth” … hopefully today someone will make a mash up of his best works….

here is his classic “7 dirty words”

click HERE for the video

On my facebook this morning everyone and this was the quote that stuck out…

“It’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.”

(George Carlin).”

Thanks Sammy!

and now … the TRASH!

here is the first lil trailer from Marley&Me … looks cute

Juliette Lewis wants to be arrested for “acting” like hooker in LA, she was walking around … not really wearing a shirt…and acting funny … yeah … what else do you expect from this dame?

Another thing that sucks … people don’t read anymore …

After 52 years, Cody’s Books will shut its doors effective June 20, 2008. The Berkeley bookstore has been a beacon to readers and writers throughout the nation and across the world. Founded by Fred and Pat Cody in 1956, Cody’s has been a Berkeley institution and a pioneer in the book business, helping to establish such innovations as quality paperbacks and in-store author readings. Throughout the 1960s and 70s, Cody’s was a landmark of the Free Speech movement and was a home away from home for innumerable authors, poets and readers.

oh well, maybe one day people will read … until then … i guess we just have to have ignorance in our world.

Jessica Simpson was at a ‘country bumpkin’ radio station in cali, and from a radio prespective, they had only sales people and no one else in the audience to meet&greet Jess and her pops Joey…

Here is what she said about … well you can just read and laugh

Jess said, “There have been stories that are ridiculous. Like my father really fit me for a training bra. Like, who believes that kind of thing!?”

I do … I believe that … yes I do.

Ewwww …. she’s a ghost and a nasty one at that …

Gus … the big winner!!

… 18 …. 31 … yeah … its just that creepy

Heroes will be back, and this is just weird since the are Uncle and Niece … eeeewwwww…and shootping

The good news is that Heroes is back in production, the bad news is that 30 year old Milo Ventimiglia and 18 year Hayden Panettiere are still dating. It is going to be weird seeing this uncle and niece acting together when Heroes finally comes back in September.

Vetran Newsie got the nod

He will be sitting in on the show until the election is over in Nov, even though it should be over now and Obama should just roll up into the White House with his possee and toss ‘ol President Bushy out on his ass…

and for you ladies …

And from earlier … here is a pic of Joan with Ice T at the filming of Celebrity Family Fued

Baltazar was at the George Micheal concert last night and had a lot of fun

We apologize now for the show you hear/heard today … he didn’t sleep and had about 15 diet cokes today…

Throw up the buckets of chicken … Jamie Lynn Spears popped out her young’en in Kentwood Louisiana … glad she’s doing ok, best wishes to her and the rest of her Junior Classmates who had kids …

I hope that’s a diet soda …

Snoop’s latest country song … i think he has smoked himself stilly

What’s wrong with this picture?!?

Are the “Girls” fighting?!?! …. im gonna have to talk with my Playboy insider about this one .. but really?!? Beef in Paradise?!!?

TMZ sources say that everyone “hates” Holly, especially Kendra. Apparently the two women can’t be in the same room together without the claws coming out.

…is this a fake pic or does she really look like that?!?!

Marla Maples … well its the first day of Summer and she’s still got it…

J Lo is not safe for work…for reals…is she stupid or something … heels and babies … nice

Miley has lots of Prison fans … and yes … this freaks her out … go figure…

breaking news: Paris Hilton off the Marijuana because of “munchies” … she’s tired of gaining weight … i would assume since she is always full of crap, she’s ripping a spliff while reading this blog

Lindsay “love of my life” Lohan . … needs to get some more food in her life

Here is the video of Balty trying his George Lopez joke … hahaha

Here is the video of John Henton and Balty admitting to having a Geroge Micheal Thong?!!?!?!

yeah … its just that sexy.

…pound it….Michelle Obama on The View yesterday … in case you missed it .. she’s pretty fly .. in this chunk opinion!

awwwh…. sad….I hope she saves a pound pup now.

Mimi LaRue died at home surrounded by her family, including Spelling’s husband Dean McDermott, 41, son Liam, 1, and newborn daughter Stella, 10 days old. “I’m devastated,” said Spelling, who reveals her dog had suffered from medical problems relating to her hips and neck for years. “I’m convinced she waited around to make sure I had the daughter I always dreamt about before she left us.”

Matty …. wasted….good times….

Britney played by a man … hahaha funny… enjoy it.

yeah … she’s naked in this issue…enjoy it.

Mario Lopez …. Baltazar’s other man crush

J Lo … doing community service giving back to some school

Here is the Junk

Lightsaber Mash-Up

Love this movie .. and the play should be great also!

When C-List celebs attack!!!!!!!!!

ol’ gute was out and about… and lost his crap on some paps…hahahaha

word

holla

cya tomorrow … going for tacos and sleep!

Darth Vader and some storm troopers do “The Thriller”

I have been using FireFox since it came out and if you dont … step up your BROWSER GAME ! !! !

here is a pic of the cake that Microsoft sent over to the guys in the South Bay .. hahaha … silly monopolys…at least they cop’ed for a nice cake

Speaking of nerd things, something we ALL SHOULD TOTALLY TRY … its called “Dripping”

According to the Daily Mail, putative trespassers select their swimming pool using Google Earth, and then notify their mates using social networking sites. The would-be revellers often turn up in fancy dress, and are advised to bring a bike (for a swift getaway). Owners only discover their pool has been dipped when they find a bunch of beer cans floating on the surface the next morning.

Those folks across the pond are silly

BRUNO IS COMING … March 2009

Here is some funny old HBO footage … enjoy

Who says the music biz isnt still making cash money … Lil Waynes sold over a million copies of his latest album … which is “put it-never take out” kinda album

This is a cool thing, Recycled tea cups for lamps … thats kinda cool

Check them out here

So, last night I was hosting “Singles Night:2″ at AT&T Park… big thanks to Eve and the whole staff over there at ‘the park!

Your Giants!

Eve and some lucky fellas at Singles Night 2

Some ladies at Singles Night 2

‘FRISCO!!!

Big ROB and Satan