Duh, don’t be that person and actually NOT VOTE … but this is the new “celeb-u-bama” PSA

Can Snoop even vote?

HAHAHAHAHAHAH

Maria was talking about this story off the air … well fellow co-worker who finds things funny …

here is the pic

and just to continue the laugh

this is worth reading …

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1081355/The-100-000-white-wedding-16-year-old-girl-lives-caravan.html

lives in a trailer … 100k on the wedding

and the kicker …. read about what she wants to be when she grows up … wow ….

After Barack Obama “nailed it” in his 30 minute info’ganda tv spot … he went on The Daily Show w/ Jon Stewart

Want to dress your kids like Mike’s???

In case you missed Stylista (spealing???) … some chick wigged out … i would watch this right before you leave work just for a good chunkle

chuckle … haha … chunkle … patent pending!

Best New Show … thats not on TV yet … but for sure will be a hit

Here’s some good Dirt on Courteney Cox: The Friends actress is returning to the land of comedy with Cougar Town, an ABC pilot in which she stars as a hot 40-year-old mother who’s newly single. Cox — who recently anchored the FX drama Dirt and has a development deal with ABC Studios — will exec produce the single-camera comedy with Scrubs creator Bill Lawrence, who also is cowriting the pilot. Cougar Town is expected to be a candidate for the 2009-2010 schedule. It’s a reteaming of sorts for Cox and Lawrence: Cox shot a three-episode guest arc on Scrubs that is slated to air later this season.

Cougar Town … check that in the awesome box.

Just got off the phone with my friend, Tapan … an indian comic who’s doing Tommy T’s this weekend … if you want to get on the guestlist hit me up ..

marcus@movin997.com

Maybe Larry “Totally has Lindsay Lohans email and wont give it over to me” Sutton might have something on this tomorrow …

Jess and Carrie are fighting again … in this economy these blondes are throwing around the fat jokes again …

“Carrie agrees that Jess is attractive but says she wouldn’t want to be as ‘buxom and top-heavy.’”

they need to fight it out …cage match style

Maybe it’s just me but I don’t sense much enthusiasm for Halloween this year. I admit I’m not the all-out Halloween-Girl (look masks scare me okay) but I have enjoyed the party atmosphere and looking at other people in costume. We’ve tried to ask those of you that call in about what parties you’ll be attending and what you’re going to dress up as but the response has been tepid at best. I get the feeling that the less-than-stellar economy is affecting people’s usual party mood this time of year. I hope this isn’t a sign of things to come for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s.

In an attempt to find a silver lining I will say this…holidays this year will give us a chance to get back to basics in terms of what these holidays are really about, particularly Thanksgiving and Christmas. (Hold up, before you want to point out some unpleasant  history or how everyone doesn’t celebrate Christmas hear me out. I am writing from my personal experience. If you want to weigh in with thoughts about other holidays I would love to read what you have to say, e-mail me maria@movin 99.com)

Allright, back to my point. This year many of us have suffered setbacks (some more than others) but we are still here. You may not have your job, but hopefully you have your health and family and friends that love you. If you have those you have a lot of what you need to get through a personal crisis. I’m not trying to be too sentimental but I almost lost my Dad this year. We have never been real close but his health crisis brought us closer and brought me closer to his side of the family. I am thankful for that and for what time we have left together. I’m not above liking and wanting “stuff” and lots of it but at the end of the day NOTHING I own is worth what my family and friends are worth to me.

As the holiday season approaches, yes times are a bit leaner, costumes may have to be made not bought, the feast may be a bit smaller and the gifts fewer but we should still be joyful because the one thing that hopefully has increased is the love in your life. Because the more love you have, the more you have to share and that’s the real reason for the season. Boo, Thanks and Blessings to you all now and in the coming year!

TMZ says that in Utah a theater was showing “Sex Drive” and then they moved “HSM3″ to a larger screen, no one told the dude to change the projector … so when the movie started … well …. if you’ve seen the intro scene in “Sex Drive” then you know what happened

Thats good funny ….

Where the hell is Lauren Hill?

Right there…kicking it with Martha “West-SIDE” Stewart … isnt that nice….

This is the pic that is starting the rumor that she’s with child …. hrmmm…….. what do you think?!!?!

Kevin Smith on his new movie, its not really safe for work, but totally funny … check him out!!!! AND GO SEE ZACK and MIRI MAKE A “BLEEEP” THIS WEEKEND!!!

If you have a 15 year old ….. dont let her wear this for Halloween

“I want to take this opportunity… also to give you the exclusive and just talk a little bit about the fact that this will be my last performance as an actor… I’m not doing films anymore,” he told the “Extra” television program.

He said Tuesday he would now focus on music, without giving details.

Rigggghttttttt…….

The woman is alleged to have bombarded Caruso with more than 100 letters in her attempt to get the TV star’s autograph. But when her repeated requests were snubbed, the suspect reportedly threatened the life of Caruso and his then-girlfriend Lisa Marquez in another letter.

Stalkers are silly

Obama is taking over the networks tonight starting at 8pm … unless you watch ABC … they wanted more money … and now they are losing the night

Zac Effron … is Mike’s biggest fan ….

you make the joke

And … yes … Mista Jackson is doing a world tour ….

Britney has no control … Pappa has taken over … forever!!!

The judge felt that rather than lawyers continually coming back to court every few months to extend the temporary conservatorship order, it made more sense to make the order permanent with the option of it being lifted in the future if Britney’s circumstances change. Britney’s medical team will continue to evaluate her condition on an ongoing basis. Jamie will oversee Britney’s career and business affairs. Judge Goetz said, “The conservatorship is necessary and appropriate for the complexities of financial and business entities and her being susceptible to outside influences.”

Pussycat Dolls FT Missy … good stuff ………….what’cha think???

I told you this weeks ago … and its back

I thought that headline would get your attention..LOL Love it or hate it, many people have been wondering about the Love Trap whereabouts. It is now all new at 6:25 on Thursdays. Please spread the word about your guilty pleasure. Now I know your next question. Why did you change the time? Well because our little show is growing and evolving. This is a good thing, we are now more than just the Love Trap. So all you die hard Love Trap fans get your fix now at 6:25.

Funny thing, I did the grocery shopping last night and was shocked to find out that the “granola” cereal was a ton more fattening than other “bad” cereals. It was half the serving size and loaded with sugar and fat. Here I thought granola was a health food. In comparison my girl’s favorite “Special K” was loaded with protein and only 110 calories per serving! If I keep eating this “not so healthy” cereal, they are going to start calling us El Gordo y La Flaca..LOL

My Myspace page is up just do a search for Baltazar 997 and you should get to me!

Erik Estrada of “Chips”fame has been scheduled to join us in the near future. My first question and maybe last is all about that George Lopez story. GLo claims Erik blew him off after asking for an autograph. He goes on with his act by calling him a “puto”. I’m conflicted because I grew up worshiping Erik and love George Lopez and don’t know what side to take. Can’t we all just get along?

FYI, Gerard Butler (300) is going to join us Friday!!!!!!  I better do a few crunches tonight at the gym….LOL

Have a great day!

BalTazer

….omfg…totally hitting the taco truck this afternoon…and when i say afternoon….i mean 10am

Thanks again to Tommy T’s for letting me do some comedy last Sunday, it helps to pay off the gambling debt….and beats washing his car.

Halloween is right around the corner, i need to get my costume ready, i think im going as Super Mario … since “Joe The Plumber” is pretty wack … and my GF doesn’t want me to put on the black face and go as Obama ….

If you dont check out FailBlog.Org on the daily … your missing out on some funny …

AWHHHHHHHHHHH CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They are back together … im putting the joo-joo out on this one … they are a sexy, smart and funny couple of clowns and they should be together … Sarah is going on the Kimmel show this Thursday … so who knows whats up…

World Fattest Man … got married!??!?!!?!?!

Moments before the love was to much for them …..

People always ask me what B is like, well you can find him on MySpace now … just do a search for Baltazar and it should pop up….

The vote is in and you want me dressing up as a woman. What a surprise! Thanks to the 34% who voted against this idea. I owe you a debt of gratitude for your efforts. Now they are telling me I have to go vote on election day as a woman. LOL I guess that will make me an official Obama Mama! LOL

Big shout to Chunk who rocked the mic last night at Tommy T’s opening up for Debbie Guiterrez. Debbie has a no nonsense approach to marriage that is hilarious on stage. As a guy I agree that women really have only two things they have to do to keep their guy happy. She says “when he is hungry, feed him. When he is horny @$%$# him.” It is that simple. I’ll throw in “don’t nag” as marital advice. I think nagging is a relationship killer. Men want to feel appreciated, we want to feel special too! We know we are not perfect, but try to accentuate the positive, not the negative. I bring this up because I just read an interesting article on why men cheat. A very small percentage cheating with a woman that was better looking than their spouse.  A huge portion of the men polled said that the mistress showed more appreciation for them than their spouse. Make your guy feel special and he will give you back the love. Everyone wants to hang out with people that make them feel good about themselves. Right?

I have to shoutout my little Giavanna back in CT who scored her first soccer goal this weekend. Goooooooooooaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope to catch up with you a later in the week, take care.

BalTazer

I just want to remind you before you start all your fun (or not-so-fun) weekend activities to please vote to have Baltazar dress up as a woman.  Movin’ VIP’s can cast their vote by going to the icon of Baltazar in a stick-figure dress and clicking on. Monday I will announce the results. When we win (I have to be optomistic ladies!) we can spend a couple days picking out beauty treatments and outfits. We’ll get all the stuff together and have him get dolled up live on the air and put the video up on the website so you can see the transformation. Despite his protests he’s being a good sport so I think this will be fun and educational. Oh, I plan to keep up my end of the bargain too! Menswear here I come!

I’m headed out for a Girls Night Out tonite with Alexa. I hope my liver can take it. It should be fun. We’re gonna hit a Happy Hour and then we’re going to a candle party. This is new on me (the candle party, not the happy hour). I’ve been to Tupperware, Mary Kay, Passion and even a cooking party but this candle thing is news to me.

I think Saturday is going to be a stay at home and catch up on my TV day. My DVR is slam-packed with this week’s programs plus I have two-weeks worth of laundry to do. Basically there’s no point in making any big Saturday plans because after tonight, I’ll be out of all my “cute” clothes.

Sunday night I am headed out to see funny Mami Debbie Gutierrez at Tommy T’s in Pleasanton. (tommyts.com for ticket info.) She is always hysterical in the studio but this will be the first time I get to catch her whole act. As an added bonus, our own producer Chunk will opening for her on Sunday night. He’s quick with the snaps in the studio too so I want to see him uncensored in front of a live audience.

That’s it, don’t forget to vote for Baltazar in a dress and we’ll be back on Monday!

Attention Movin V.I.P.S vote No on me dressing up as a woman. I have no “manifesto” ( I like that “man” ifesto..LOL) like Maria but I simply urge from the bottom of my heart to vote NO! Thanks

Today on the golf course should be interesting. Ooh I can’t wait for the first important putt I have to make and someone says “does your husband play golf” LOL

Oh, oh this just in from the tech department..the vote is 60-40 in Maria’s favor to have me dressed as a woman. Come on “No”! We will have the results Monday at 8:30

I hope you get a chance to check out the SNL Thursday edition it was off the hook! The funny part was when it started, I was like they are playing an old skit from a few years back because it was Will Farrell who left a few years ago. Then he said the name Sarah Palin and I was “oh $*@! then is new” and I’m telling you, Will plus Tina Fey and then Daryl Hammond as McCain..LOL

Are you dressing up your pet for Halloween? We are getting our “Angel” costume today to dress up Kitty this weekend. BTW her pooping outside the litter box has lessened (I just jinxed it)

Here is something that will make you laugh, Maria got me Tom Brady’s website so I could send him a get well message. (Tombrady.com) I’m typing away telling him how I met him back in the day when he first got drafted.blah.blah..blah when my laptop starts going into hybernate mode.I’m like No! No! No! As it shuts off. There’s 30 minutes of my life I can’t get back. LOL

Gotta run, see ya Monday!

BalTazer

Vote no! And I’m not talking about any of the propositions. I’m talking aboutthis morning’s conversation about Sarah Palin and Maria’s complaint that women are judged more than men about their appearance. I was doing ok until I asked why women had so many shoes. Then Maria challenged me to the bet (check podcast). So when the poll goes up,  I urge you to vote NO on me having to dress up as a woman.  Again, I urge you to vote NO. In espanol, por favor vote “NO”!

Thank you, gracias

BalTazer 

I have challenged Baltazar to dress as a woman for a day. He doesn’t want to, he’d rather choke me instead I’m sure but if he has to, I think it will teach him a lesson. In a bigger sense I wish we could all change places with a group we make assumptions about so we can learn the real truth of what it’s like to be them.

Now, back to Baltazar. We can teach him(at least from a fashion and grooming standpoint) what it’s like to be a woman. I urge you to go to movin997.com and cast your vote “yes” for him to dress like a woman for a day! I’ve challenged him on the air but ladies, the real decision is up to you. Please vote.  Men always crab at us about how much we spend on clothes, accessories, beauty treaments. Granted, a lot of stuff we get is “want” but more than they know is “need”.

I’m lucky to work in an industry where I can wear pretty much anything to work as long as it’s clean and covers my naughty bits. But I’ve had jobs where I was required to wear pantyhose and dresses or skirts and I wasn’t living in the balmy Bay Area at the time. Try an outfit like that in Buffalo, New York in the winter when you’re catching the bus! (I don’t care how long your coat is or how thick your tights are, the wind will have its way with you!) . 

Just think, men open their drawers and choose boxers, briefs or boxer-briefs, a t-shirt that’s scoop or v-neck with or without sleeves. Then depending on their work it’s jeans or khaki’s and a tee or polo. If they are in “business” its a dark suit, shirt and tie. The appropriate footwear be it work boots, loafers or dress shoes. That’s it. They basically have a uniform.  When we go to the closet: dress, skirt or pants? Suit or separates? The underwear choices alone would stop them cold. The accessories we have to wade through and they wonder why it takes so long for us to get ready. I’m not going to go into all the waxing, shaving, plucking, sucking, steaming, polishing, spritzing, curling, frying and dyeing we have to do. If the situation was reversed we would be dating a bunch of badly dressed Bigfoots!

In conclusion, ladies I need you to go to the web and vote, not just so I win but so we all win. We will make an example of Baltazar so he can tell other men what it’s really like and maybe just maybe they will appeciate what we go through. So the next time we buy a new  purse or shoes or article of clothing instead of saying “How much?” they’ll say “How nice!”.